Things-things-things

So, it took some time before I started blogging again. It’s all because I wish I had more time to spend with my little girl. However, I wasn’t able to really have the exact amount of time I want to be with her while I stay in Mindanao. There’s just so much work around the house that we barely have an hour straight enough to play. When I wake up, I fix the bathroom, wash the clothes and blanket she’s peed on, clean the house and many more.

                Just a few days from now, I would be in Manila to start college. It’s a tough thing to be away with your most precious one. For almost a year, I was so careful lying down in bed because little Denise sleeps with me and with one careless turn I might hurt her, lying down on her hand or arm, etc. and I can imagine from now, at the very first morning I wake up in Manila when I arrive, I would be still careful but when I’ll look at my side, there’s no little Denise lying there, and it’s a different ceiling. :C

                But then, that’s life. Sometimes you have to be far from your love ones for a while, for a while. It maybe for fulfilling your dreams, for yourself, for them. And it’s amazing how in the midst of the hard preparation I am doing for being away from my daughter, God has given things to help me cope up.

                I can’t wait to share this! I’ve got a new online job, and it’s the first that I have. It’s writing spun articles. It’s quite hard but I’m blessed to have a boss who can understand. The schedule is flexible and the best part is I can earn money. I love my job and I always thank God for it. I really hope I would be in this job for a long, long time. I want to train in this job and to improve even more. As a writer, I love this work which rotates in articles, and you know, when it’s something you love that you’re doing, it’s not work anymore. You enjoy it.

                My plan for the money that I’m going to earn from this job is to set aside the tithes, and then use some to reward myself, and save it. Just four years from now, I want to start building my own space, maybe just with my family, or in Davao(where I always wanted to live). However, I have college ahead of me and I might absorb some more things that might change the way I look at the future.

                The bottom line of this article is things come after things. Take a look at the title and see how it’s enchained. Nothing ends up one, and in life we should chill and enjoy everything that comes our way. Some things we don’t like, some things we love, but that’s the way it is. It’s so good to be alive. 

Bag-a-holic!

I am such a bag-a-holic! I’ve been to almost every stage of wearing a bag, from backpacks in elementary, to sling bags in high school, and finally shoulder bags in college. I love bags. I can put in every single thing that I would want to bring with me. I can even use it to make a statement, even by simple just standing in a corner, my bag does the work to not make me look like a fool. So, here are the bags that I am very proud to have.

So, that's pretty much it. I love my bags, and they love me back! Ü

I recommend this movies!

Perfume

As a writer, I appreciate literature, so much. Therefore, I love watching films that have a different twist in its story, films that you don’t normally watch. I like films that go somewhere, and have a real story. That’s why I fell in love with the movie, “Perfume.” After I watched it, I literally wanted to grab a copy of it for keeps!

It rotates around an adolescent man, who has the best nose in Paris. He works for a perfumer, and later on made a perfume. It was an expensive one. The cost is the lives of many beautiful women who have wonderful fragrances of their own, from their own human body. Interesting to know that the man didn’t have any smell of his own.

While you’re watching this movie, it’s like you’re dreaming you lived in old Paris charm. It just brings you somewhere. You’ll agree how lovely this film is after you’ve watched it.

Pearl Harbor

Another thing that I appreciate is history. Everything that there is now is because of what was before – democracy, freedom, technology breakthrough, everything. Watching Pearl Harbor was like being one with the U.S. military when they attacked the Japanese. While you’re watching, you are like cheering for them to win. It was like I was being a patriotic citizen of America.

I am not an America, but I love America. It has helped my country, Philippines to improve so much. It has lent huge hands of help to my country many years before I was born until today. I also love the accent of their speaking, the freedom that they have, and its land where I want to go to someday. I see that America has so much comfort in it.

I don’t really understand the Japanese. There’s a spot in my heart that sees the Japanese differently, bad different. For a certain, it’s because of the pains that the Japanese has caused my countrymen’s who lived many years ago. History has put to writing the bad things that they have done the abuse that they did to my countrymen many years ago. I know that they will pay one day.

I am also struck about the love story rotating between Danny, Rafe, and the girl that they both love. I almost cried when Danny was dying and Rafe told him he couldn’t because Danny’s going to be a Daddy. It was a moment.

This movie, you should watch.

My Labor Pains

“The best way to understand your mother is have a child of your own.”

I hear that line from adults a couple of times before. Older people often say that our parents really had a hard time on us when were born for us to be stubborn. I wasn’t able to get the logic not until the time that I gave birth to my first child.

I waited for long months. Every month felt like it was a year. During my pregnancy, I had back pains, I was bored inside the house every day being alone, it felt so hot, my whole body was big, my feet was swollen, and every morning my feet cramped so painfully. Those hardships lasted for more than nine months because I was overdue. My pains were prolonged.

On the ninth month my doctor decided to induce me. I was happy that finally I could mark a dot on my calendar of the day my pains will end. Later did I know that it was the most painful day of my pregnancy. I came to the hospital the day I was ordered to. Many pregnant women were lined up the door of the doctor’s receiving room in the hospital for check up. I was sitting outside with my mom when a doctor and a nurse looked at me and I could tell from their face they understood why I’m there.

It was eight o’clock. After five minutes, the nurse told the doctor that the room and the apparatuses are ready. The doctor and nurse called me to the delivery room. The nurse helped me with the white gown and assisted me to lie in the bed where women deliver their baby. The doctor placed the medicine for inducing in me and ordered the nurse to confine me.

 Since there was no vacant private room, I was temporarily confined in the breastfeeding ward. I met two patients, one was in the case of ectopic pregnancy and the other, her baby is sick. I wasn’t bored because I had companions, but the room is too hot since the sun is directed to my bed. The ventilation is poor so I had to be patient. The mother of the sick baby told me how she gave birth. She labored for two days.

I was nervous because I didn’t know what I was going to feel. I didn’t know if I would be able to bear the pain of giving birth. Most stories of women giving birth are of pain. At one o’clock at noon, I started to feel my womb contract. It was not that painful but I felt uncomfortable. It’s like it’s a pain under my chest and at my back. As time goes on the contraction’s interval comes closer and closer, thus more painful at each time.

It was until I didn’t know if I could still bear the pain. It is like clusters and clusters of pain of menstrual period attacking your womb at the same time. I held the metal head board of my bed so tight hoping it would lessen the pain if I would exert effort, but it did nothing. I was so devastated by the pain I felt, I was so painful. I can’t think of a word terrible enough to picture what I felt at those moments.

I felt some kind of relief when I was transferred to a private room during my fourth hour of labor, however the pain is still there. My mother and her aunt didn’t know what to do but tell me encouraging words just so I could cope up with the pain. It was so painful that every time it struck I couldn’t move even my eyes, because it would let loose and I’d feel more pain. I would only hold tight to whatever is near my hand. It was late, but we all couldn’t sleep. Sometimes I would shout. I didn’t know if I could still bear the pain.

I was at my eighteenth hour of labor , I was transferred to the labor room right next to the delivery room. It’s horrible, feeling and everything. The room is cold, and there’s blood on my bed and floor, and my whole body could feel the pain. I was brought twice to the delivery room to check if it’s the baby’s time to come out. Every time the doctor would say “no,” it feels like I feel more pain. On my twenty-first hour of labor, I was brought to the delivery room to finally deliver my baby.

I asked the nurse to turn off the aircon because it was so cold. Extreme pain, I could feel. I didn’t have the strength to push my baby anymore because of my twenty one hours of labor. So, the doctor decided to forceps the baby. It was a hard time for me and all of us inside the delivery room. Until, I heard a baby cry.

It was my baby raised upside down. It was the best relief I’ve ever felt. I cried. It was worth all the pain. Now, in my hands, is the precious baby I have long been waiting for. 

Baby's first four

I can't help not to share my baby's first four teeth. How cute is this picture, huh? I took it for remembrance. I'm just a bit worried, because they say that kids whose teeth grew early have the possibility of having their teeth damaged easily.

I don't have strong teeth. Most of my permanent teeth were damaged as early as twelve years old. I now have tooth fillings and a tooth canal. From eleven to thirteen years old, I have frequent tooth aches, and that's also the time when my teeth started to have damages.

I want my child to have the best set of teeth. That is why I set it a goal every day to clean her teeth with a clean cloth while she's young. When she get's older, I'll teach her how to brush her teeth three times a day. I heard brushing your teeth more than three times a day would also make the teeth weak.

Our pearly whites score on the charms we have every time we smile, that's why it's one of the things I take most care of, of my daughter.

Too soon

I remember when I was kid, I always wanted to do things older people do. Given that I'm surrounded by a lot of adults. Only me and my younger brother are the kids in the house. I wanted to do the dishes, I want to wash clothes, I want to sweep the floor, but they wouldn't allow me because I'm too young. It is not bad to help, but I do not know how to do it properly even if they teach me, because biologically, I'm still incapable.

Until I grow up to be a school girl. I started to be given the responsibility to help around the house by doing chores assigned to me. And at that time, I didn't want to do things I used to called "work of the old people" anymore. I changed.

When I reached high school, my parents talked to me about getting into relationships. I wasn't allowed to have a boyfriend while I am still studying. However, due to peer pressure and other "humanitarian forces," I got into relationships, some are serious relationships. And now, I have sown the fruits of the works that I've done, both negative and positive.

Don't you realize? Many of us wants to get where we want to be, even if it's not in time. We race over time, wanting to be where we want to be even if it was not yet meant. In our own point of view, this is right because this is what we want.

Most of the time we love to do what's forbidden. In the end, I found myself stopping schooling for a year, and this whole year I realized so many things. It might be normal for us to change every stage we grow to. However, it is important to take in guidance from experienced people(specially parents). Yes, we make mistakes, but is it not better to avoid it? We do learn a lot in mistakes, but long as we can learn lessons in easy ways, why not?

I know I may not be good at this. However, due to my life experiences, I want to share that we all normally go extra steps fast. Most of us want to grow up too soon, but what would it be like if you were not prepared. It's very difficult believe me. However, when you're already there, it's a challenge for you, how you handle it.

I ♥ Julia Montes

I don't know why I like Clara so much. I just find her really pretty, no matter how contrabida she appears to be. I like Mara too, but I like Clara a lot better.

I used to hate her when it was not yet found out that she's the real daughter of Garry, but now that she's poor already I like her so much. After she and Mara had been kidnapped, she became a good girl, except for the fact that she's hiding Garry's secrets about the kidnapping.

So, a couple of days ago I researched about her. I learned that she's half German, and her real name is Julia Schnittka. Most half breaded Filipinos are really attractive, and she's one of them. I believe she's a tall girl, and I can't wait to see her in person. Specially for the fact that I'm moving to Manila this June, I think I would have more chances to come to her mall shows. She may be a contrabida on television, but she's a sweetheart.  I'm a huge fan of her.

I still like Mara for Christian. Julia Montes would be paired up with the best teen star that will look great with her. I just think that she's too pretty for Albie Casino? (I'm a fan of Albie too.)

I'm always watching Mara Clara, and I'm thrilled for more 'moving' episodes. I ♥ Julia Montes!